Saturday, February 21, 2009

Fast and Dumb

Here's a very quick meme that I saw over at Allsorts.

Google the words "unfortunately,______", inserting your first name into the blank. I cheated a wee bit. My first name is Harriett, so I tried that first, but apparently there's a book called "Unfortunately Harriet" and there were nothing but references to the book, so then I tried Anne (the name I go by), but there were nothing but references to Anne Frank, which I found a bit depressing; so I went with Annie, which is what my family calls me.

Here's what I found:

Unfortunately, Annie and The Hedonists are, as I mentioned above, not well known outside of upstate New York

Unfortunately, Annie is left to realize a man isn't always interested in a woman

Unfortunately, Annie loses all the money they win betting on horses

Unfortunately, Annie’s superior shooting abilities play havoc with Butler’s delicate ego

Unfortunately, Annie returned and abducted Reva, leaving her in an abandoned airplane to plummet to her death

Unfortunately, Annie discovers that he has been out of his room and she punishes him

Unfortunately, Annie finds the gardening tool in her uncle’s shed

Unfortunately, Annie is soon caught and returned to the orphanage

Unfortunately, Annie's lustful eye fell upon the young man

Unfortunately, Annie weighed on Alex's mind and he left Lorna at the altar

Unfortunately, Annie gets the blame for this, too

Unfortunately, Annie was already in the cage and ready for their co-ed tag team match.

My favourite is the last one.

I think these describe me very accurately. Except maybe for the "superior shooting ability" - but then again, I've never fired a gun, so you never know...


Nigel said...

Unfortunately, Nigel knew that his long run of good luck was inevitably going to walk, for Nigel knew that his gay lover from Glasgow was after revenge.

Unfortunately, Nigel mistakenly thought that an undercover police officer was interested in him.

Unfortunately, Nigel's schedule is too busy to respond to individual letters, but he enjoys receiving and reading his fan mail very much.

ian said...

Ooooo... this is good fun:

Unfortunately, Ian had to give up his position in the band because of other work commitments and the band no longer exists.

Unfortunately Ian had a secretive nature, and was good at concealing his feelings from others.

Unfortunately, Ian has my mailing address and can track me down.

Unfortunately, Ian has had to withdraw from racing as his broken bones and a continuing collapsed lung, means that he struggles to perform the most basic of daily tasks, even simply sitting up.

Unfortunately, Ian, perfectionist that he is, decided not to actually apply a finish to his vase.

Unfortunately, Ian is not Greek.

Jane said...

Unfortunately, Jane had been laid off from her company after 9/11 and had just run out of her COBRA coverage the previous month.

Unfortunately, Jane but was also just one more Protestant threat to her throne.

Unfortunately, Jane finds her inheritance conditional and her situation critical

Unfortunately, Jane’s husband loses his job, and Jane and her family move to Missouri.

Unfortunately, Jane's unlucky streak continues when she and her best friend since elementary school, Tim, discover the dead body of Tim's assistant in his flower shop.

Unfortunately, Jane then hears Tarzan talking fondly to his pet chimp, Cheeta, and mistakenly thinks he is talking to another girl.

Unfortunately Jane’s hearing was so bad, she couldn’t understand anything anyone said.

Unfortunately Jane clobbers Elvira with a hammer from behind and kills her before she can help.

Unfortunately, Jane comes up with a theory about cows and their mating rituals.

Unfortunately, Jane is an unstoppable force when she gets enthusiastic about something

Unfortunately, Jane cannot say "no."

Unfortunately, Jane became frustrated as she tried to settle into her new position

Unfortunately, Jane tragically died 12 days later from complications of childbirth, after gorging herself on roasted quail.

emerald_away said...

Unfortunately, Elena had not dropped yet so we were sent home to return that Friday.

Unfortunately, Elena lost to Arantxa, but Arantxa was playing superbly at this time.

Unfortunately, Elena's father doesn't approve and so he takes Elena away.

Unfortunately Elena did not have the relevant document at hand during the meeting.

Unfortunately, Elena discovers the body.

Unfortunately, Elena has a serious flaw.

aniexma said...

Ha ha ha ha ha! Those are all too, too funny!

Jane said...

and on the "fortunately, Jane" note...

Fortunately Jane spent time in the marines and is able to kill the mutant with a naval cannon she kept as a souvenir
Fortunately Jane has memorised the sequence required to withdraw the desired amount of money

ian said...

Those are very funny. We might as well throw Mom and Dad in the mix as well. Here's some for Mom:

Unfortunately, Harriet has no way of judging how misanthropic she’s become.

Unfortunately, Harriet has been largely forgotten in the decades since her death.

Unfortunately, Harriet's imagination sometimes gets the best of her and when her notebook is found, her friends and family are not too happy about its contents.

Unfortunately, Harriet and disaster go hand in hand, and if something can go wrong, it certainly will.

Unfortunately, Harriet’s perceptions of her friends
and acquaintances are not always kind.

Unfortunately, Harriet and Beldon can't seem to keep their hands off each other, and with interfering families, other candidates for their hands and a pantomime, will these two misguided lovers ever discover they were meant for each other?

ian said...

And some for Dad:

Unfortunately, Murray not only fails to rebuild confidence through the remainder of the book, he actually diminishes it.

Unfortunately, Murray doesn’t seem too long on honor.

Unfortunately, Murray has been a bit careless with his memories.

Unfortunately, Murray takes a very strong IQ-deterministic view, which will lead a lot of people to dismiss what he has to say.

Unfortunately, Murray’s teaching is rather harsh regarding the rapture.

Unfortunately, Murray was lost himself, when his training in the North Sea went predictibly wrong.

Unfortunately, Murray liked the married wives of his colleagues.

ian said...

And following Jane's lead, some "Fortunately, Ian..." items:

Fortunately Ian has a definite masochistic streak and previous experience indicates that bloody-minded stubbornness can overcome good sense and the body’s desire to stop.

Fortunately, Ian knew an associate who happened to be dressed in a bunny suit at the front of the line.

Fortunately, Ian didn't lose any teeth.

Fortunately, Ian was home this time to help “pop” it back in.

emerald_away said...

Alright, it's time for me to be fortunate.

Fortunately, Elena is able to escape through a small window.

Fortunately Elena is not seriously injured.

Fortunately. Elena had received good grades on the weekly quizzes.

Fortunately, Elena was in time with her intervention and the hypnosis was successful.

Fortunately, Elena had purchased tickets that included being able to have a seat.

Fortunately, Elena promised not to touch his face.

Jane said...

I can't stop laughing....

Dave Robertson said...

I love how the top search result when I did this began "Unfortunately, Dave's space ship isn't the only thing that's running on 20% power." :) :)

at Rings & Things

Penny said...

I tried this MEME but was unable to get anything interesting. I am tagging you to try my Rock Star Club MEME. Go to my blog and check under March 2.
It is a fun one.